Hello dear Readers!
Lets talk about love today.
Yesterday my friend called me and somehow unexpectedly the conversation turned to the topic of youth. He said: I have a friend who looks great, he is in his 60s but he looks 40. And he also said: I was always amazed at how cheerful he is, at his inner balance and how great he looks. And he added: I asked him, can you tell your secret? Why do you look so good?
My friend then said: before that, I also talked to an actor who also looks great, much younger than his years and feels great as well. I then asked him the same question: what is your secret?
The actor said a very simple thing. ‘Everyday I smile and try to be happy. That is every day you need to look for a reason to be happy. Even just a small reason. Bring joy to yourself and bring joy to others. Smile whenever you can.’
So I realised that maintaining this inner balance and good-nature leads to love. When a person walks towards me — I want to say hello but I don’t know him. Instead I say 'hello' inside. Smile inside. If you didn't have time to say thank you to someone, say 'thank you' internally. This will form a piece of happiness — in our soul.
And what did his friend tell him? He said: if you know how to create a state of being in love, you will look young. The practice of falling in love is not necessarily with a person, it can be with anyone or anything. The feeling of joy that accompanies when someone or something exists, the inner warmth that a person gives away makes him happy.
Then I remembered Omar Khayyam's words: 'Be drunk with love'. Why drunk?
The fact is that this is a translation of the first main commandment of Christ. The commandment of bliss. 'Blessed are the poor in spirit'.
The way we are made is we have dialectical opposites. This is how the two brain hemispheres - left and right — work in opposite modes. So that logic and feelings work in opposite modes, although they are identical in essence. Logic is the accumulation of experience. It is rational. It appears to understand everything. There also exist ephemeral feelings. Are they real or unreal? In fact our feelings, our soul and our subconscious are the same. If you compare consciousness and subconscious, then consciousness is, let's say, one grain of sand, and subconscious is all the beaches of the world.
So a person who puts reason and logic first will do well at first. He seems to have everything. But he does not have a strategic vision of the world.
His feelings begin to get distorted when they follow mind and logic.
Therefore, in order to feel love, the main things we must look at when we look at the commandments of Christ - is for love, feelings and the soul to be put first and reason second. I then considered how we all know the commandments of Moses and the commandments of Christ, but we don’t really understand them. Apart only from “Do not kill, do not steal”, which are self-explanatory.
It turns out that Moses’ commandments are the commandments of preserving love. In order for love not to be wasted, and for us not to reject love, we must first treat the source of love — that is the Almighty, correctly.
The first commandment is to love God above all. The creator is One. That is, He is the source of everything, he is the source of happiness, health, life — all that we have.
When a person did us a favour or helped us with something, we will have warm feelings for him. And when a person often provides help and cares, then a sense of love and gratitude results.
But God provides infinitely more than any other person. Therefore we have a natural feeling of love for God. In the past people worshipped the god of sun, because the sun provides life-giving energy without which there would be no life. But the Almighty gives far more than the sun can ever give. As such we must have gratitude for Him. Therefore — we must love God, and have gratitude. Do not worship anyone but God. Do not be condescending towards Him. Do not ever put the Almighty in the second place. The pagan seeks to put himself first and make the Almighty the performer of his desires. So, the commandments of Moses help a person to maintain love for the Almighty without diminishing it in anyway.
The fourth commandment is the Sabbath day.
This means not being completely consumed by human affairs. Rest at least once a week. Remember God and pray in order for your soul to grow and to gain strength.
The remaining commandments- from the fifth to the tents are the commandments of how to treat people.
In order to maintain love in relations with people:
First, we need to honour our parents.
Why? Because parents gave us a physical life. If we do not respect our parents, then we will not respect the Almighty who created our souls.
Forgiveness comes through adopting the correct attitude towards our parents. A strong family comes from respect for our parents. And moreover, our internal attitude to the whole world and to people is copied from our attitude to our parents. Where a person does not respect his parents, then he will have a skeptical attitude towards the whole world. At the very least such a person will not have good health.
I spoke to my friend a year ago. She spoke of how she met with ex-classmates: 'we talked, had fun, but there were few of us there. I noticed one strange thing — all those who were critical and cynical about life and about people, were not there. They're all dead. But all those who were good-natured and kind, they were there'. Therefore, a person who does not lie, is not envious, will not rob and steal and will enjoy good health.
So what do we discover from this?
Disingenuity gives rise to lies. Lying gives rise to self-interest and a desire to steal. The desire to steal turns into a desire to rob. Wanting to rob will ultimately lead to murder. Therefore, the ability not to succumb to self-interest, the ability not to lie, the ability to sacrifice and be good-natured is a component of happiness. This is the feeling that precedes love. And the commandments of Christ, take note, say that in order to increase love in your life, you need to not just follow some rules. You need to have a certain feeling in your heart.
You need to create a state of being in love and maintain that state. Then love will manifest and grow. If we make thousands of actions and follow rules, then we will not always succeed. This is because there is no one system. We stay in our old state whilst trying to do something new. For a short time it may work but in the long term it is very unlikely.
But when we enter a new state and a new feeling, a feeling that we are in love — then love will take precedence and will really begin to grow in the soul. So what do Christ's commandments really mean?
First - love should be put first above everything.
Second - blessed are those who mourn.
When logic comes first, logic never forgives wrongdoing. The person whose logic comes first, whose ego takes precedence, he will want revenge. He is unable to forgive. Logic does not forgive. Whereas the heart forgives. This is because at the level of the soul we are all united. We feel the Almighty’s Will and understand that everything is meant to be. Therefore resentment can be overcome when we put the soul and our heart first.
Blessed are the meek. Those who can hold back their animal instincts.
Why are they happy? Why will they inherit the earth?
Those who can restrain their desires can eventually fulfill their desires. Desires are fulfilled by those who can restrain their impulses. A person who is unhinged, passionate and lustful, will not possess great assets because he will become a slave to his urges and impulses.
Blessed are the sincere. Being sincere means feeling united with others. If I am sincere to a person, then I have a sense of unity and love for him. If I begin to lie about something, then I feel that I am above him, I manipulate him. I will have a feeling of superiority, self-interest and so on.
I recalled the story of the monastery where people were cured by asking to smile all the time. A person walked 4 kilometers uphill to get water and had to smile all the time. He also had to smile the whole time he was walking with a heavy bucket. When he did not smile, the monk who watched him through binoculars would say: 'You need to get water again'. And these painful walks whilst smiling led to the person’s recovery.
So what is the secret of a smile? Why does a person recover? Because a smile is one of the manifestations of love. There are already theraputic methods, for example when you organise your space correctly, such as when you hang photos around you where people are happy, where people are smiling and pictures with sun and joy. This is then transmitted to you and you begin to smile and begin to feel better.
Like the person with advanced cancer who was watching comedies all day and eventually fully recovered. So what is a constant smile? It turns out that a constant smile is a constant feeling of not just happiness but a feeling of love. And if a smile does not fade no matter what problems we have, then this is called unconditional love. That is a person is not treated with a smile but with unconditional love. This is love which doesn't depend on whether you have problems or not.
Therefore entering a state of being in love, and aspiring for unconditional love, which is like the sun shining to everyone, both good and bad, it is like a feeling that we are Divine in nature, and if we do not forget about it, and we are ready to change, then the love in our souls will increase.