Recently, an acquaintance confessed to me: «I've been reading your books for 15 years and only recently began to truly understand their meaning.» There are quite a few such confessions. Why is this?
The fact is, understanding comes when we start to feel our problem. Recognizing the problem can help somewhat in correcting behavior, but internal understanding only comes with feeling. Deep awareness, understanding of what's happening, arises with the accumulation of experience, when a person finds themselves in a traumatic situation not just once, but many times.
My books contain quite unexpected information, which is not so easy to comprehend. In my books, I try to simplify and compress the information as much as possible — sometimes clarifying, sometimes repeating, sometimes looking at the situation from different angles.
When I conducted consultations, I often found that many people, despite having read all my books, could not apply this information in practice; they did not feel its meaning and essence. Then, based on the specific mental and psychological characteristics of the person, I had to change the way information was presented in order to convey it to the patient. I increasingly receive emails asking for help, clarification, rescue...
Some emails I simply glance at and set aside because I see clear consumerism, an inability and unwillingness to work on themselves, to change. Others I respond to, and then I have to structure the information so that the person understands what I am talking about, so that they can change, educate themselves, and move in the right direction.
With each person, you can find a specific key; with each person, you need to speak their language. Therefore, in responding to reader emails, I primarily take into account the individual's personality traits, their character, and their family history.
When you have extensive experience interacting with patients, then just a few lines can help you sense what the author of the letter is like, and accordingly structure the information so that it is understandable to the person and helps them change.
In responding to letters, I tried to combine knowledge of the laws of the Universe, the most general information — with an individual approach to each person. As a result, I have gathered material for several books. I offer readers the first book.
Certainly, each person requires their own approach, their own way of explanation, everyone has their own key to solving problems. However, there are common problems, a common understanding, and a common solution to these problems.
Communicating with readers often yields real results, sometimes completely unexpected. When the character and fate of a person and their children change, it brings me great joy. I would like to share this joy with the readers, and I hope that this book will help many in their development and understanding of the world, in changing their character, improving their destiny, overcoming diseases, and other problems.
*****
Reader's Question:
Good day, Sergey Nikolaevich!
Thank you for helping people, thank you for your books and for your hard work!
Please help me understand my situation. I am plagued by doubts before the wedding.
My boyfriend is planning to become a priest. I respect him, I am grateful that he came into my life, but inside, I feel uneasy.
What repels me is that his behavior shows greed. I understand that this is related to my attachment to the material, to my strong desire to enjoy material things and to consume.
It is important for me to see that a man is ready to give for a woman... but I do not feel this.
Is my heart telling me that he is not the right person for me, or is this my temptation?
Psychologists write that a woman chooses before the wedding, and then she must accept; and that it is better to run away from greedy men immediately.
I understand that rejecting a person is not right, it would be a mistake, as it would mean that I am placing material things above love.
Respectfully…
*****
Response from Sergey Nikolaevich: A man is the protector of the family, this is his main function, and a woman is the keeper of the family hearth. A man should be ready at any moment to sacrifice himself for the safety of the family. If a man, although greedy, is still capable of sacrifice, that is not so bad. However, if greed is accompanied by cowardice, if he is fundamentally incapable of sacrifice, what kind of husband, friend, and partner in life can he be?
As is known, marriages are made in heaven. This not only means that spouses meet in advance on a subtle plane but also that not everything in our lives happens according to human logic. If there is no special love, then one can look at the situation from the perspective of human logic, so as not to regret the wasted time later.
The law of development is also a law of selection. When a man is strong strategically, emotionally noble, kind, generous, it means he will have healthy offspring.
If a man is strong in spirit, meaning he is intelligent, determined, talented, then it will be easier for his children to achieve something in life. If he is physically strong, meaning he is physically robust, has money and prosperity, then his children will be able to receive an education and not die of hunger.
For a woman, it is natural and perfectly normal to look for a strong man to create a family so that the children will be viable.
But if you have love for this person, in this case, you should not think about choosing but about the fact that you will have to re-educate your husband and that you will face suffering and trials.
As they say, it is as God wills. If a woman is imperfect inside, she then gets an imperfect husband on the outside. And then there's only one way out — work on oneself!
S.N. Lazarev, «40 Questions About the Soul, Fate, and Health»
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