How can you replace judgment with reproof
We often receive the instruction: «Do not judge!» While reading the Lives of the Saints, you often come across the fact that the saints knew how to reprove those around them.
I would like to get a clearer explanation of what judgment and reproof are, as well as understand the difference between them. How can we replace judgment with reproof?
Thank you for your work!
Sincerely...
From the perspective of Judaism, condemning a person who has violated the commandments is the norm.
This is natural, as it has long been believed that judgment is closely linked with punishment and inseparable from it.
And punishment is a form of education.
Jesus Christ announced a transition to a new stage of thinking—He separated judgment from punishment.
The commandments of Judaism primarily concern a person's behavior.
Christ's commandments, however, are directed toward the soul, toward a person’s inner state, and their feelings.
At this level, on the level of the soul, we are united with God. Therefore, judgment becomes a serious violation, leading to catastrophic consequences.
This is why, in Christianity, judgment is considered one of the main sins.
Often, after reading the New Testament, people conclude that it is wrong to judge, that you must turn the other cheek to an offender and not resist evil, meaning that it is impermissible to confront or reprove an evil person.
This is a misconception of those who lack monotheistic thinking and cannot think dialectically, combining opposites.
The Holy Fathers knew how to reprove their neighbor. What is the difference between judgment and reproof?
At first glance, it is difficult to distinguish one from the other. Criticism can either be judgment, which is a condemnation, or it can be help.
When does criticism become help and serve the good of the soul?
Our criticism becomes helpful when we first think of the person warmly and acknowledge that their soul is divine, and that we are united with them on a subtle level.
Our first feeling should be love, and our first desire should be to help.
We need to see the good in a person before we can criticize their actions, worldview, or character.
When the initial impulse is love, criticism turns into help.
Criticizing someone behind their back makes it easy to forget about love and unity, and to slip into judgment and disdain—turning our criticism into the destruction of another.
But when we speak face-to-face with a person, it’s easier to feel unity with them and to maintain a warm feeling toward them.
The word «reproof» comes from the word «countenance» (or «lik» in Russian, meaning «face»). To reprove someone, you must look them in the eyes.
In this case, it’s much easier to first show them your respect, goodwill, and unity, and only then point out their mistakes, misunderstandings, or improper behavior.
S. N. Lazarev, «The Recipe for Happiness»
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