Our Life is a Theater
My husband left me.
Although I understand that the reason lies within me, I was still overwhelmed with feelings of resentment towards my husband, towards fate, helplessness, judgment, loss of the meaning of life, and so on.
I constantly tried to pray and forgive—it didn’t help. Self-persuasion and self-suggestion also didn’t help.
I felt like I was falling apart.
I will skip the long and painful process of my internal search for a way out of the situation.
I intuitively found my key to this problem—the principle of «feeling for feeling.»
That is, if I experience strong negative feelings, I don’t suppress them or push them deep inside. Instead, I start to simultaneously experience another feeling—imagining how my husband's harsh behavior brightens my field, the field of my daughter and descendants, how our fate improves, and so on.
And all those negative feelings towards my husband disappeared on their own, leaving a sense of happiness, emotional uplift, and (oh, miracle!) gratitude towards my husband for healing me and my descendants!
Thus, one feeling replaced another within me.
Now that negative feelings no longer blind me, the road ahead is open, and I genuinely feel love for my husband, even though he lives elsewhere and probably has another woman, and he shows no interest in me or our child.
But I am still happy and thank God for this!
There is no need to ask God to change the situation—why would I? After all, I am happy!
Now I just reinforce the result reflexively.
Conclusion: do not repeat my mistake, do not fight feelings—another feeling will do that, not logic.
Now my periods are short and there is no physical discomfort, whereas they used to be very heavy and prolonged, and the fibroma or myoma (I don’t remember the exact diagnosis) in my uterus has disappeared.
Only now do I understand that I not only read your books but also felt their impact on myself.
I will use this experience in situations related to any human relationships.
Now I consciously take the next step, moving on to topics where there are no human relationships—fate, life, desires, will; here, probably, another key is needed, and I will search for it, because I have a small «whip» that will push me forward—I experience pain in my heart.
With love, respect, and immense gratitude...
Why is Theater One of the Oldest Art Forms?
The fact is that a person on stage must simultaneously experience two different, sometimes even opposing, feelings. The first feeling is the one that underlies any play, life, and the universe itself. This is love. Every actor playing their role in a play must experience this feeling. The second feeling is related to the specific situation and depends on it. This could be joy, pain, sometimes happiness, and sometimes tragic sorrow.
The ancient Greeks particularly loved tragedies because in tragedy, love does not mix with joy and does not merge with it. If an actor forgot about love and cried real tears, they would be pelted with rotten tomatoes and eggs to remind them that the world is dialectical, that love contains both happiness and unhappiness, that one of our feelings should be directed toward God, and the other—simultaneously—toward this world.
Our soul is multi-layered. At the highest levels, it is open to love and God, and its feelings are directed toward Him. There are also feelings in the soul that strive toward higher planes. In addition, there are feelings directed toward our animal nature. This entire range of feelings and emotions is united by our soul, just as the entire world is united by Divine energy.
At the end of the play, there should be catharsis. Throughout the action of the play, good and evil struggle with each other, and in the end, love must triumph. Not goodness, not justice, but love, which allows us to see the unity of the entire world and understand that evil is merely a lack of love and goodness.
Not knowing how to ride a bicycle is, of course, a drawback. However, if a person who cannot drive gets behind the wheel of a car, it is already evil because it can lead to people's deaths. When we have a lot of energy and little love, goodness turns into evil.
When a person restrains energy and increases love, it is like a powerful high-speed car being driven by an experienced driver, not an amateur. Evil turns into goodness.
If we perceive someone as evil, then, from a pagan point of view, they should be destroyed. This same pagan thinking is inherent in modern medicine, which views disease as an evil to be eradicated.
If we understand the relativity of evil, then we will feel not resentment and hatred toward a loved one but a desire to help them change. For this, on the one hand, love is needed, and on the other, the limitation of instincts. Our grievances and claims are merely a primitive attempt at educating those close to us.
But it's one thing to demonstrate them to someone who has offended us, as if calling and pushing them to change. It is entirely different when the offender is far away—in this case, judgment and grievances are already an energetic murder. The feeling of fear is useful at the moment of danger, but it corrodes us if there is no danger.
When a loved one is near, you need to educate both them and yourself. But if they have left, it is a sign that you need to educate yourself first and foremost. Our life is a theater. Throughout our lives, we participate in many diverse plays. At the end of each play, we must experience catharsis.
Love must burst forth, testifying that everything is united, that the inner world is always beautiful, and that everything happening is an opportunity to feel love.
You have managed to do this. Congratulations!
S. N. Lazarev, «Survival Experience, Part 6»
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