To feel the Divine within

A woman cries on the phone: 'I've already been to your consultation. I have major issues with my son. He's very cruel, constantly argues with everyone, insults us, and although I've consulted with you, nothing has changed. He recently chopped up his dog with an axe, and yesterday he tried to kill his wife with an axe.

I see his energy field. There's a single, but very powerful attachment—creativity, childbirth, creation. An attachment to childbirth, family, a loved one creates jealousy and resentfulness.

'Listen,' I say, 'your desire to make a loved one the purpose and meaning of your life hasn't faded. To a great extent, you've passed this on to your son. And if you love something more than God, eventually you'll start to hate it.'

'But I did everything you said. I don’t know why there's no result, but I tried very hard.'

'Let's repeat,' I suggest, 'in your family lineage, there’s an absolutization of creativity, creation, childbirth.'

'Yes,' the woman says. 'In our family, there were great talents in painting and drawing. My son also tried to paint and draw, though self-taught. But he's not good at it and gets terribly upset, almost crying.'

'Before conceiving children, higher human values must be humbled, even the desire to have children, the desire to create and build. But you’ve clung to these desires with your frustrations and regrets so much that the slightest failure throws your son off.'

'We didn’t have children for eight years, and I really wanted them. But my husband didn't care and didn’t want to get checked or treated. And it hurt me so much.'

'Your son, in a past life, when his plans for creation and building fell apart, when the desire to have a family was humbled, didn’t accept it. In this life, God initially didn’t give you children.

You could wish for them and do everything for it, but you weren’t supposed to resent yourself, fate, or God. But you resented, especially against God. Moreover, your husband was sent to you by God and fate. When he brought troubles through him, by resenting him, you resented fate and God. Resenting God breeds devilishness and immense cruelty.

The more you understand and pray, the more you'll cleanse your son and descendants. It's better to be an atheist, unknowing of God and only resenting another person, than a believer who resents fate and God in response to trials.

Now, looking at the woman's field, I see that she has understood. Her son's field also improves. Initially, I only saw jealousy, which made it difficult for the woman to correct the situation, and it seemed to end normally, but I was troubled by one question I couldn’t answer. I can't guide a patient through every link of the chain. I describe the main links, and he cleanses the rest intuitively.

At this moment, this hasn't happened yet. I repeatedly tried to understand why no changes occurred after the first session. There was some problem, but I couldn’t grasp it.

At that moment, I was called to the phone. A patient from the Far East called. His son has cancer. A kidney is affected, and there’s a large tumor in his abdomen. I look at the boy's field and see no severe deformations. There’s an attachment to creativity, creation, childbirth, but it's very subtle. Again, I can’t understand. Some reason holds, but I can’t see it. I've replayed events from previous days dozens of times.

Trying to combine accumulated experience with intuition, I recall the conversation with the woman. Perhaps the boy had resentments against fate and God? Here, I seem to touch upon the main link. Colossal resentments against God due to problems with a loved one. I’m used to observing the spiritual level directly linked to the body. And severe illnesses are defeats on higher planes.'

I'm observing the first level of resentment towards women. It was at 1300 units, now at 70 units. The level of fate (resentment towards loved ones, fate): was at 3000 units, now at 1000 units. The level of resentment towards God: was at 4000 units, and remains the same at 4000 units. There are still resentments towards the future.

Strengthening the connection with the future enhances spirituality, so when the future is offended, the spiritual is also offended. This can only be endured when the rate at which love flows from the soul exceeds grievances, i.e., love for God exceeds love for everything else. But why is the boy's field changing so slowly? I realize that I haven't managed to get my own affairs in order.

Looking at my own level of this aspect: resentment towards people is at 2000 units, resentment towards God at 33,000 units. I am somewhat perplexed. Who am I if I have such parameters of aggression towards God? And what will my books teach on a subtle level if my soul looks so poor?

I remember the first time I jumped into water from a great height headfirst as a child. I stood for a long time, afraid, then gathered my courage and jumped. When I pushed off, having flown a meter, a strange desire to go back arose. Now I have the same desire. When I realized what I had gotten into and wanted to backtrack, it was already too late.

The first book, it turns out, changed the energy so powerfully that I could not stop writing the second, since very significant points in the first book were not covered. What would have happened if I hadn't examined my field or come to understand 'resentments towards fate, the future, and God'?

One thing consoled me: I explained to the patient that the higher a person's level of development, the deeper his grievances if he clings to that level. Since I have such claims against God, it means that in my previous lives, my level of development was probably quite high. It is from there that I brought resentments against God.

If the Creator didn't destroy me at the beginning of life, there were not only negatives but also positives in me. When I was finishing the first book, an interesting situation arose. I received information in the text, which was approximately: «If you don't admit that you carry the Divine within you, the book will not be published.»

I am a scientific researcher of biophysical structures, my method is scientific inquiry, analysis, comparison, trial and error. I am honest to the end and report specifically what happened to me. Newton discovered the law of terrestrial gravity. I am engaged in discovering the laws of spiritual development. But they wouldn’t let me remain just a scientist. And I wanted to release the first book, in which the information was very important.

As soon as I accepted it, everything went smoothly. The same situation occurred at the end of the second book. I must admit that I carry God within me. They made it clear to me that I would not remain only a scientist when writing about such things. Only now have I realized the matter: each of us carries God within us, but it is practically unmanifested.

And it must be manifested in me because if I talk about things that I've come to understand only as a scientist, it could be dangerous for me and others. As human values evolve, the inner contact with God must manifest more strongly. People should increasingly feel that they carry God within them.

Understanding the world by only ascending the steps of a ladder is impossible; it will collapse. One must not only climb from below but also descend from above. The finer the plane we access, the more logic, experience, and analysis recede into the background.

Thus, a person must simultaneously feel themselves as a physical body, flesh, dependent on the surrounding world, interacting with it and with God, who is independent of the surrounding world and only radiates love that creates, invents, and develops. And this Divine particle we must constantly feel within ourselves, then no human values can bury us, no matter how much we may love them.

S. N. Lazarev, «Karma Diagnosis 3»